Between Parent and Child

Haiim Ginott has made it clear that parents, teachers, and adults in general may have a tremendous effect on children's development. In his book Between Parent and Child, Ginott denotes, "I've come to a frightening conclusion! I am (as a parent or teacher) THE decisive element in any situation. It is my own mood and approach that decide the outcome of a situation". Adults own ignorance, which makes them believe that punishment remedies misbehavior when it only breeds and reinforces the very same pattern of misbehavior. Ginott emphasizes the importance of understanding and empathizing with children, as it allows for a more effective and positive approach to discipline. Parents and teachers often attack and criticize the child's personality traits and attributes instead of focusing on the actual misbehavior. Criticizing a child's character only serves to damage their self-esteem and create a negative perception of themselves. This can lead to a cycle of misbehavior, as the child may feel misunderstood and resort to acting out for attention or validation. Instead, Ginott suggests addressing the specific behavior while still affirming the child's worth and potential for growth. When children feel understood, their loneliness and hurt diminish. When children are understood, their love for their parents deepens. A parent's sympathy serves as emotional first aid for bruised feelings. When we genuinely acknowledge a child's disappointment, they often gather the strength to face reality. Let's treat our children the way we were treated when we were young—with empathy, understanding, and respect. By validating their emotions and offering support, we can create a safe and nurturing environment where they feel valued and heard. This approach not only helps them navigate their current challenges but also lays the foundation for healthy relationships and emotional well-being in the future.